Some of my acquaintances have told me I should practice Buddhism - they say this might work to alleviate some of my feelings of despair. To this end, I researched Buddhism on Wikipedia, and while I agree with two of the four noble truths, I know that at least for myself, there is no way to reach liberated enlightenment (read: a state free of suffering).
I know this because I have been meditating constantly for 14 hours, and I feel this light on my face, and I see myself in the mirror and know that I am glowing, but I feel no release from my misery. If anything, I am only more conscious of the sadness in the world. Yes, I crave nothing (at least for now, I know when this glow fades my voracious hunger for catnip will likely return) and I am filled with light, but each particle of that light contains a deepening darkness.
A crystallized knowledge of pain.
Enlightenment is suffering, suffering is enlightenment.